YOUR 5 YEAR OLD, TELLING LIES.

since i found out i was 'with child' which is nearly 93 months ago i have been getting monthly emails from babycenter.com. i get little notes, tidbits, and things to think about regarding your '7 year old' or your '5 year old'. this month's was, 'your 5-year old-telling lies'.

i barely read these emails anymore. i mean, i totally have this parenting thing down now (i lie). but i've since gone back and read the article. because, apparently i have a sneaky little liar on my hands. and really, if there is a whole article about 5 year olds lying, it must mean that a) my kid is normal and b) i'm not failing as a parent being the mom of a liar lair pants on fire, amiright?

ian has been having trouble concentrating in school. he has trouble focusing and staying on task. the teacher has emailed me with her plan of placing a sticky note on his desk and if he is asked more than once to 'settle down' or 'pay attention' or 'please stop bouncing and throwing your pencils across the room' or is told to 'keep your hands to yourself and stop saying poop'. he get's a check that he then has to bring home.

last week i challenged him and said if he came home without any check marks, i'd take him out for ice-cream.

and on FRIDAY when i picked up the kids from school ian proclaimed 'MOM  I DON'T HAVE A STICKY NOTE! I GOT NO CHECKS TODAY!'

yay! cheers! alex and i praise him. i tell him how proud i am of him we are going for ice cream! of course it's friday and i'm brain-dead and tired and want to be home in my sweat pants. the kids on the other hand, are full of boundless energy and want to spend the next hour at the yogurt place. but, i'm the boss and i win so i say 'let's go to safeway for a giant tub of mint chocolate chip and a red box!'

alex whines, complains and pitches her 7 year old tween fit. ian obliges, happily. 'sounds good to me mom'.

no complaints, i should have seen the signs.

last night at bedtime, in the middle of story hour ian confesses.

I: 'mom, so. on friday, i had a substitute teacher'

M: 'oh really (i say not putting 2:2 together)'

I: 'yes, mrs. kolb was sick'

M: 'alright buddy, want to finish your book?'

I: 'well (he stammers) the thing is substitute teacher didn't know about the sticky notes. but i still didn't get any checks or be silly'

M: 'did the teacher ever have to ask you to pay attention or settle down?'

I: 'nope'

I: 'maybe only one time.'

I: 'in the morning, but twice after lunch'.

M: 'thanks for telling me buddy, it seems like you should have told me friday when i took you for ice-cream'. by telling me the truth, i may have rewarded you anyway. it's always best to tell the truth'.

I: 'i also didn't brush my teeth this morning like i said, can i have a reward?'